Monthly Archives: September 2007

In the covert intelligence community, this is euphemistically called an “extraction”. – Kiran  

Who am I today? Urban Tarzan. – Kiran    

A little birdie who would know, tells me, that a little birdie told him, that the best hummus can be found at Drama’s Deli. Just walk up to the counter and ask Big Guy for ‘something special’. But remember, if you start asking Big Guy a … Continue reading →

Mmmmm….no, really, I can’t. I have an op-ed piece due tomorrow morning for The New Yorker, followed by a photo shoot with Heinz – “the Lexus of Ketchups” and I’m hosting an American Idol-themed luncheon the following day. Oh, and I’m growing … Continue reading →

I know! And can you believe the doorman wouldn’t let me in the door– even AFTER I took off my sparkly red feather wig! – Kiran  

MR. FERRARI  The modern man drives a Ferrari careening across a crowded intersection at 130 MPH, chest hair extruding from his vintage tee and smelling of Aqua Di Gio. On the other side of the intersection is a harem of Brazillian models and a … Continue reading →

The Associated Press reports that the sky is blue, grass is green and something about my abs. I believe “sculpted steel” were their exact words. – Kiran  

HY! Wh stl my vwls? – Krn    

Since the Low-Carb Movement, bread has been marginalized as “The Other Monosaccharide” and only allowed to fraternize with other wheat products. Soon after, coffee was labeled a “carb lover” and went home to find his house teepeed. — Why can’t we all just … Continue reading →

SPY VS SPY (EPISODE 2) [CONTINUED] ….the operative in question was a double-agent. And just to prove his sincerity, he gave a little fist-pump as we parted ways. And fist-pumps don’t lie. I stealthily pressed on, sans couch-disguise, and made my way to … Continue reading →