Author Archives: Jenice

I think it’s worth noting that our Neil Diamond Tribute Karaoke Show on Thursday nights is always “Sweet Caroline” free — I don t recall ever attending a conventional karaoke event where that song isn’t ritually disemboweled. Everyone always has to sing along with … Continue reading →

Finally! The first issue of K-Style Magazine will be in bookstores near you. Our magazine will include topical articles like, ‘Is information technology affecting our relationships and how we dress for the winter?’, an article about leggings probably called ‘What happens after leggings?’, some pictures of cool headphones and one … Continue reading →

I’m telling you Super Fred, there is going to be a ridiculous curve coming in our Ethics Of Journalism/Contemporary Mud Sculpture class. How do I know? Well, 80% of the football team is in it and the median grade on last week’s essay test … Continue reading →

Yeah, well, there are alot of reasons why Grover and I don’t hang out anymore. We just grew apart — and then there was that time we got into that wet-and-wild catfight in the lily pond. No, wait, that last thing was a scene … Continue reading →

Today I received an invitation to attend “An Evening of Catullus: Readings from the works of the celebrated Roman poet”. But I think I recall enough basic Latin to translate “works of the celebrated Roman poet” means “Roman dudes wrestling in a dead language.” Snooze. … Continue reading →

There’s really only one acceptable time for a grown man to cry, and that’s when one of the Ewoks dies in Return of the Jedi. I mean, not that I do or anything. So what if they’re cute little teddy bears that … Continue reading →

Why the look of general unease and discomfort? My pants are cinched right under my armpits and my eyebrows need a trim. – Kiran    

I’ve got a big scoop everyone! A well-placed source tells me that Big Bird is raising Sesame Street’s methane levels by trading his distinctive boullion-style paintings for fugitive cows in Cinncinati and starting a foundation named after the four backup dancers that escaped from the Macy’s … Continue reading →

MY FIRST LEMON WEDGE    

Emotionally, I’m still celebrating Thanksgiving – radiating thankfulness and generosity. Physically, I’m feeling like a giant stuffed elephantelope. – Kiran