Category Archives: Uncategorized

Free carpentry services for the first ten supermodels to contact me. Call now. Offer ends today. – Kiran

MOVIE HAIKUS by Shaan I Love You, Man The most endearing film, Of the decade, Which is ten years*. * And that’s saying a lot because 10 years holds a lot of movies

Put down that double-tall decaf soy mocha latte – it’s time for a round of air-kisses! – Kiran

MOVIE HAIKUS by Shaan Monsters vs Aliens Some stuff happens, To some monsters, While some other stuff happens, Somewhere else.

I LOVE WRITING IN ALL CAPS. IT MAKES ME FEEL LIKE I’M RUNNING REALLY FAST WITH MEL GIBSON IN GALLIPOLI AND HE’S YELLING TO ME BECAUSE YOU HAVE TO YELL WHEN YOU RUN AND WHEN YOU DO IT ALWAYS SOUNDS … Continue reading →

Are you looking for work? If so, I have a variety of projects which require your assistance—I need to schedule a bunch of mani-pedi appointments and have someone file my collection of kung fu movies. – Shaan

Here I am demonstrating step-by-step the hand-to-hand combat between myself and a violence-prone chair and an equally vicious table. – Shaan

SMILE OF THE DAY

Um, okay, so I accidentally sort of watched part of an episode of RuPaul’s Drag Race last night and now I am completely convinced of two things: 1. We are definitely living in the end of times and 2. It … Continue reading →

No, definitely not. Contrary to what you may have heard from the proverbial grapevine, I am most certainly not “crushing” on Abbie from across the street 1600%. Okay, maybe 440% verbal, 410% math, but that’s because she already has a … Continue reading →