Monthly Archives: January 2009

Listen: I’m bailing out of Kiran’s World a little early today. I’ve got to get an outfit together for tonight’s cocktail mixer that will shock, horrify, and/or get me a date. – Kiran

Reportedly, the price of bananas is up almost 20 percent over the last year, while eggs are up 35 percent nationwide. Costco and Sam’s Club recently began rationing bananas to prevent hoarding. OK, who here has been hoarding bananas? – … Continue reading →

SMILE OF THE DAY

Glow Worm: Sooooo, how was your date last night with Emily? Shaan: She was nice enough I guess – kind of pretentious though. She’s into avant garde music — I repeat, “avant garde.” I mean, she could’ve just said “weird.”

Drop your glasses, fashion cognoscenti: monocles are back—in style! To explain this fashion trend we need only turn to Mr. Peanut, the monocled ambassador of salt and nutty goodness whose de rigeur accessory will be this year’s fashion must-have. And … Continue reading →

In blogs, everyone’s hot. You click on a page and read about someone’s washing machine cycles or the new pair of culottes they just bought and you think to yourself: “Huh…they must be hot.” The problem I’ve found with blogs, … Continue reading →

As some of you know it’s time for our Annual Battle of the Bands Competition. I was trying to figure out how to open the festivities. At first I thought, how about doing my love life through the lyrics of … Continue reading →

I’m suing McDonalds for forgetting my McNugget sauce last night. Have you ever eaten one of those things dry? That’s a taste that will never leave you. Or in other words: Cut me a check, Grimace! – Shaan

Everyone was all “ooohs” and “ahhhs” because Kamar De Los Reyes from One Life to Live showed up at Big Bird’s Charity Picnic yesterday. But this was meaningless to me. The only soap I watch is Passions. Go ahead. Groan. … Continue reading →

Fozzie Bear does so much good with his fame. He’s almost like Bono, except his accent is more rustic than Irish. But sometimes, Fozzie’s fame is put towards evil uses, like spam. Fozzie’s name makes a lot of people click … Continue reading →