What’s up today? Optimus Prime and Jazz are making statements with their chests, Shaan is traveling to the center of the earth on a six-story rocket yacht and I’m trading my clunky Rolex with the huge metal strap for a skull with a sundial carved on it’s forehead. – Kiran
Wouldn’t it be fun to have a dog named Detroit so that when I went to the dog park and had to call him I could make the rock ‘n’ roll horns with my hands and scream, “DETROIT!” – Kiran
Seriously, whenever Optimus Prime and I are at a party together, someone will inevitably ask him to break out his guitar. He’ll be sheepish about it, but he’ll bust it out and start rocking, and every woman in the place will eventually be at rapt attention. Whenever I break out my word processor at parties, I can never garner quite the same reaction. – Kiran
Whoever “borrowed” my Metallica CD, please return it to me ASAP. I need some genuine rock spirit for my training/race montage this afternoon and then Zebbie needs it tomorrow for his Powerpoint presentation on the Middle East. – Shaan
Carb-counters rejoice! It’s “National Eat Whatever You Want Day” a holiday started presumably by frustrated dieters who decided that it would be better just to eat the brownie/baguette/chalupa already. Initiating guilt-free gorging…….NOW! – Kiran
PERSONAL ADS
SM seeks female Earthling, Vulcan, Klingon or Romulan to chart a course to romance. That, or share a cup of coffee at Starbucks. I will gladly rendezvous at any designated coordinates around the Orange County star system. – Shaan
How am I going to shed all the extra holiday pounds? Isn’t there something out there that can just transport my fat cells one by one to a distant galaxy? – Shaan
Instead of just looking over Kiran’s shoulder, I’ve attached myself to his back for the day. I don’t feel like an obstacle or hindrance, but instead supportive and helpful. And who doesn’t enjoy a back hug? I know I do. – Shaan
How come my “moustache” is on my head instead of under my lip? And how am I going to get my special Monday ‘moustache’ discount at TGI Friday’s? – Shaan
My new moustache is the jam! I’m going to pair it with a witty ironic T. Not the “I’m Kind of a Big Deal” kind but more along the lines of “Are You Deaf ‘Cause I Swear You Sound Like Lou Ferrigno”. – Kiran