Kiran and Shaan's World

AN INTERVIEW WITH KIRAN THAKUR  

If you were President of the United States, how would you solve the following problems? The war in Iraq?

Mmmm…easy. Partition the country into three separate autonomous regions; one region for people who keep it ‘real’, a second region for people who say things like ‘stay up homie’ and a third region for ‘ironic’ fashion statements. That way no one feels like they’re getting shortchanged on the oil. Next?

Global warming?

Update the Kyoto Protocol. Tie the whole thing to some sort of fund so that developing nations have incentives to reduce their own emissions and stop making cars that are bigger than Alaska. In the meantime, researchers at the U.S. Department of Energy have been attempting to utilize my environment-friendly masculinity to fuel automobiles and rockets, but so far, it’s only managed to stop bullets.

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