Kiran and Shaan's World

There are a few important — and DEVELOPING — stories that I will surely share with you all at a later time, like when I’m not rushing off for a pedicure. (Hello! Priorities!) – Kiran

It’s Wednesday and just so you know, the anthem of the day is: Don’t give away the milk for free when the cow’s already been bought. – Shaan

[Editor’s Note: Um, I don’t think you meant what this sentence actually says. – Kiran]

Ummm, so I just heard that the casting agent for the Death of a Salesman revival is looking to immediately hire an actor who can infuse the role of Willie Loman with quiet desperation and impersonate Donald Trump at the same time. Gutsy choice. Aside from the unique casting I’m also told that the production will be different from all other Arthur Miller commemorative productions in one important way: puppets. – Kiran

On Monday mornings I like to start my day with a sticky bun and a relaxing sippy cup of kombucha tea steaming at my elbow. Everyone else however is getting a jump start on their personal projects. Shaan is writing a 24-part epic poem using only personalized ring tones and Verdell is advancing the agenda of showtunes. (“More jazz hands!”) – Kiran

What does it say about our current zeitgeist when women size you up only by the quantity and measurements of your flat screen television collection. I wonder what Shaan is doing about this?* – Kiran

[* Measuring my plasma television screens. – Shaan]

WELCOME BACK

A hearty thank you to Shaan, who managed to keep the website afloat with his delightful posts and witty insight. Join us all later tonight at my “Welcome Back” Party. My grand entrance will be accompanied by the release of a thousand doves against a deep dusky sky as a chorus begins to sing: Halle-lu-jah! Hallelujah! Hallelujah! Hal-la-eh-you-ya! – Kiran

Unfortunately, Kiran’s World is suffering from some technical difficulties, which may or may not have to do with the giant gerbil that is camped out on my keyboard. Please check back with us later for all new posts and photos. And don’t forget to come by and check out our kitchen – you really have not lived until you’ve seen the walrus that ate all our food. – Shaan

Apu – you can’t buy an Apple PowerBook from a street vendor for $100, okay? As tempting as this deal might be, all you’ll get is a fake laptop made of cardboard, spray-painted platinum silver and finished with a hand-painted Apple logo done in white-out. What? It comes with a two year extended AppleCare warranty? Well, maybe it’s worth it after all. – Shaan

Clear your mind. Inhale, exhale, and go blank. Now: What’s the first phrase that pops into your head? The gift of dance? No way – me too! Catch me later this afternoon when I’ll be demonstrating the most important steps from the 80s including The Cabbage Patch, The Bogle and The Smurf. – Shaan

GEOGRAPHY 101

Of course Uzbekistan is not only one of two land-locked nations. There are a gazillion (er, around 42) land-locked countries in the world. Let me clarify: Uzbekistan is only one of two doubly land-locked nations – meaning all the other nations surrounding Uzbekistan are land-locked in the traditional sense. – Shaan

P.S. And no, Sarah Palin did not pass this very same test.