Wait! Wait! Please! Just one more question for my questionnaire:
What’s the biggest sin?
A. Using red pens
B. Bathing in Drakkar Noir
C. Wearing very very wide legged jeans with unknown sneakers
D. Endorsing off-label use of Preparation H as a skin cream
Okay everyone, this is where the verse is gonna go…and it’s gonna be emo. – Kiran
Remember to join us this evening for “Swine Flu Awareness Night” featuring a pork rib eating contest and carnival games like “Pin the Tail on the Contagion”. – Shaan
For the past week Kiran and Shaan’s World has been plagued by “technical difficulties”. Our demoralizing “interweb” travails have included:
Sunday: Backed up (server exploded).
Monday: Backlash (wireless router decides to go on strike).
Tuesday: Another backlash (constipated video card develops hemorrhoids – yes, true).
Wednesday: Backed up again (new wireless router demands 401K and two weeks vacation).
Thursday: Backlash (video card unable to function due to said hemorrhoids).
Friday: Got rid of everything and rebuilt the computer using 8 coconuts and twine.
Today: Drafting a post for tomorrow entitled “How to Get Third-World Level Internet Access”.
And now that we’ve found a more reliable rodent to power our server, posting should resume immediately. – Shaan
We Are Experiencing Technical Difficulties; Please Stand By
Have you heard? Elmo will be serving for three months as interim prime minister of Laos, Grimace married a fifteen pound pimento loaf in international waters (bridesmaids included two croissants and a pretzel) and Zebbie is hanging on to a marginally influential seat in the British House of Commons. – Shaan
Whoa! Hold on ladies – I just moisturized. – Kiran
SMILE OF THE DAY
The boring gossip: Big Bird’s ten-second performance of professional-quality Running Man at the Annual National Audubon Society Soiree was a big hit with the crowd. The more interesting personal gossip: Big Bird is dating…Cameron Diaz? (WHAT?!). Big Bird also hastened to clarify to partygoers that Cameron is his “No. 1 Girlfriend.” Why the enumeration? He has a habit of picking up other women. I mean literally. I saw him pick a brunette right off the floor and give her a full-body hug at the party. – Kiran
SMILE OF THE DAY
