After much pleading and begging, I finally let Elmo drive my Ferrari Enzo. But I dunno – if Elmo crashes my car tomorrow’s headline will read “Elmo strangled to death and then stabbed and then shot a couple times by angry Enzo owner.” Although that’d be kind of a long headline. Maybe they could use a small font or something. – Shaan
Sometimes I like to fly to Hawaii for a couple of days of sun and relaxation. It’s good to enjoy life and get back to the simple pleasures. Like jet-setting to Hawaii at a moment’s notice. You know, normal day-to-day stuff that the rest of us take for granted. Kind of makes me stop and think about how good I have it. This afternoon, on my third flight of the day to Hawaii, I’m going to really enjoy it this time and not just go through the motions. Somebody fetch me my Superman cape and my giant #1 finger. – Kiran
Last week I joined our Neighborhood Watch to keep our streets safe from invisible monsters. I didn’t name my fists ‘Justice’ and ‘Fury’ for nothing. – Shaan
VIDEO OF THE DAY
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BwFF9Nx9GX0
All everyone’s been talking about is last night’s “Super Moon”. Well you know what? It’s not that great. The Super Moon also blocked my view by sitting right in front of me during “The Avengers”. It also talked non-stop to his friend Mars throughout the entire thing. – Kiran
VIDEO OF THE DAY
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CdjCY3QxXUM
Really Big Bird? Who starts a fireworks show count down from 60? You start it at 10. And if you do decide to do it from 60 then at least do it right. Don’t leave out random numbers and skip from 20 to 10. And then after counting down from 10 do it all over again because you realize you left out 19 through 11. He counted down from 10 twice. Twice! – Kiran
[Editor’s Note: This post was sponsored by Angry Mathematician Man: he’s angry and he’s a mathematician.]
Ever since Megatron got a tummy tuck he insists on showing off his stomach to everyone, but that’s only to distract people from looking at his pecs. I mean, have you seen those things? They’re not the same size, the same shape, or even pointing in the same direction. It’s like the plastic surgeon forgot what he was doing halfway through and just started sticking things in there at random. On his right you’ve got some teeny fruits and vegetables, and on his left you’ve got, like, a bike or something. His floor lamp? – Shaan
Dad doesn’t like it when I cover the stairs in moisturizer when he’s out. Something about slipping on the stairs and his “sky-attica.” Old people talk funny. – Shaan
SMILES OF THE DAY
